Escort Me REVAMPED
by Setkia
Summary: Sanji is an escort in order to pay off debts and buy back the Baratie from Don Krieg. He is charming, flattering and a complete prude. He has a hatred for his job, not at all proud that he's been reduced down to having such a despicable occupation but a certain green-haired regular makes things a bit more bearable. HAITUS
1. Chapter 1

_**Author's Note** : Okay so if you've read my chapter 22 which wasn't really a chapter of **Escort Me** , you'd know I'm editing **Escort Me**. I've decided in order to have a fresh new opinion of this story, I will be posting a new story which is basically just **Escort Me** , revamped, so that it isn't such a horrible mess and you guys don't remember the horrible mess it was before. So yeah ... Edited, longer chapters that make more sense. Updates will happen every 2 weeks to make sure I'm happy with the kind of content I'm posting. Chapter 1 and 2 are relatively the same but I would still love feedback, I'm not sure if people have ever done this before in this manner, but yeah ... I don't own **One Piece.** This story is really just going to be more organized, and even if you've read the horrible mess that's **Escort Me** , I hope you still find it within you to review to this story and tell me if this is happening any better. And now on with the story! No flames please, please don't judge me for this, I'm figuring my own way out of this._

* * *

 ** _Escort Me_**  
 _By: Setkia_ _  
Dedicated to_ _ **CaptainNapkin**_ _cause you're awesome and you totally saved this story from having serious plot issues._

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is an escort in order to pay off debts and buy back the Baratie from Don Krieg. He is charming, flattering and a complete prude. He has a hatred for his job, not at all proud that he's been reduced down to having such a despicable occupation but a certain green-haired regular makes things a bit more bearable.**

 **Roronoa Zoro is a member of a gang, the Shichibukai, and he's regretting it deeply. In order to obtain back a sword of his departed friend, he joined their ranks. He can't handle it some days and goes to rant about it to a curly browed escort. However things change when the gang decides to recruit a member by the name of Sanji.**

* * *

PART ONE: RECRUITMENT

Chapter 1: The Number One Requested Host

* * *

"Sanji, someone's asking for you again!"

The blond smiled at the red haired he was currently speaking to and motioned for her to wait a moment. She did so with a smile on her lips, a giggle escaping her mouth. She wore far too much make-up in Sanji's opinion. Natural beauty was better than cosmetics. Sanji fastened up the middle button of his blazer and strode over to the tall man in the degradable outfit. His voice annoyed Sanji beyond belief, but he dealt with it anyway. He had to.

"Who is it?" he asked, glancing over the man's shoulder as though this would help him. He ran his fingers through his blond locks, fixing them up. That girl liked to play with her hands and they were rather sharp to be honest. "Do I know them?"

"It's a man," said his co-worker. "Name's ..." Bentham checked the clipboard but before he could speak, Sanji cut him off.

"Roronoa, right?" Sanji dusted off his blazer and paused for a moment, contemplating. She was a nice girl tonight, a bit annoying but then again, he couldn't adore every one of his clients. Did he want to end it because of that stupid Marimo? "Tell him to wait fifteen minutes, I need to finish up with my current client before I can take him on."

"Sure, but Sanji ..."

"You're begging to ask a question so ask it."

"I thought all of your clients were female."

Sanji thought about this for a moment. "They are," he said slowly. "Just ... Not this one."

It was clear he was even more curious now, after all, a cryptic answer was always less satisfying than no answer at all. Sanji had a way with words that had people clinging to his every last one, regardless of which sex would hear him speak. There was something about his baritone that others found relaxing. He didn't know what it was about the man before him that had him getting laid every other night, his voice was nauseating and quite frankly, he hated it. From the look on the man's face and the way his eyes seemed to narrow, his blue eyeliner becoming more accented with this motion, he was probably questioning what had suddenly made Sanji change his tune. Or rather, his team. Of course, any assumptions he made would be false, but Sanji was too tired to argue with him over it; they could have that conversation another time and knowing the man, there would be no avoiding it.

"If you don't mind, I have to get going," Sanji said. "Can't keep a lady waiting, can I?" He flashed the man a grin before striding back towards the woman, a smile plastered onto his face, his blue eye sparkling with just a tad more light.

Zoro was here.

Honestly, Sanji hadn't expected him to turn up again but he had been coming twice a week for the past two months. Host clubs were more for women rather than men, at least that's what Sanji thought but two months ago a green-haired man had stumbled in, obviously drunk. He had randomly latched onto Sanji while he stood outside the club on his break, trying to avoid others. As a result, he was forced to sit in the back of the club while listening to the man rant about how his life was strange, unbearable and absolutely regrettable. As though that wasn't Sanji's life in a nutshell. Eventually the man had sobered up and left. Despite the fire that had engulfed him when speaking to the strange man, something clicked in his head, there was just something liberating about talking to a drunk man while sitting in between dumpsters. Strange, but so was his life.

He hadn't thought the man would've even remembered, being so hammered, but eventually he had come back, sober, asking for the blond. Sanji wasn't sure why he still saw him, perhaps because of how easy it was to let his mask slip and let loose, allowing himself to feel everything he held back during the day.

"Sanji-kun, do you have to leave?" asked the girl with a pout. Her glossed lips were sparkly and purple under the dim light of the side room.

Sanji sat down next to her and grinned. "I'm terribly sorry to say that I do have to leave you now, but feel free to come back whenever you want, I'd be glad to see you at any time."

The girl frowned. "But ..." She trailed off, her hand resting on Sanji's thigh. "We didn't get to—"

"I have someone waiting for me darling," Sanji said smoothly. "I need to be going now."

Reluctantly, the woman let him go and walked out with what seemed to be left of her pride. Apparently, she hadn't expected Sanji to reject her.

Sanji walked into the bathroom and undid his tie, putting it in the back pocket of his black pants, unbuttoning the first three buttons of his shirt. It felt good to breathe. He undid his cuff-links and then after making sure he still looked presentable, he walked out and entered the room again.

He laid himself out on the love seat, relaxing. Having Roronoa Zoro as a customer was like having a break in the middle of the day. It was absolutely wonderful and Sanji was beyond grateful the man had never asked for a different host.

"Curly Brow."

Sanji scoffed, feeling no need to straighten himself out at the entrance of his latest client. "Shitty Marimo."

The tall tanned man smirked at him. "Curlicue."

"Moss-head."

"Dart Brow."

" _Ahou_."

"Ran out of creative comebacks did we?"

Sanji rolled his eyes and laid out comfortably on the love seat, grinning at him. "So want to tell me about your shitty day?"

There was something about Roronoa Zoro that was different. There was no way being a host in one of the dodgiest areas of Tokyo had ever been Sanji's plan for a sustainable lifestyle; this was a temporary setback and as such, he cared very little of the lives of his clients outside of his workplace. Of course he still heard stories, heard the rumours, learnt about cheating wives or unfaithful husbands, but those stories were stored away into a file in his mind labeled: _pointless crap that's heard daily._ Maybe it was the green hair that had him intrigued, or how very vague the man always was when speaking about his day. He still didn't know his profession, though Sanji was sure there was a reason for that. If he knew, he'd have more insults for him and of course, the Marimo would hate to lose that competition.

"Just dealing with the typical assholes," said Zoro with a shrug. "Nothing unusual. They really need to learn about punctuality or else I wouldn't have to be so hard on them ..."

It was things like this that made Sanji think perhaps Zoro was a teacher or the chief of something or another. If he was though, why didn't he arrest them all? Technically the club wasn't the most legit place in the world and clearly there were prostitutes and the like, yet they had never been called on it before. Then again, if he was a police officer, he wouldn't have given his real name, would he have? Then again, the occasional police chief would come in. What was his name? Sanji wasn't too bothered by his lack of remembrance; all he needed to remember was that the guy stunk up the place with his cigarettes faster than Sanji could light his own.

They spoke very little, considering how little Zoro liked to reveal about himself and Sanji didn't press. The silence was welcome when he compared it to the loud blaring, pulsating music of the dance floor. Zoro had never been as talkative as he had been that first night.

The club's very existence was for the purpose of allowing others to escape reality and do as they pleased, all their dirty secrets revealed and yet kept under wraps. Customer confidentiality. That was why Sanji found out about all of the married women who liked to cheat on their husbands. If Zoro didn't feel like divulging such information, then Sanji was okay with that, that was his right.

It didn't mean he wasn't curious though.

"Why do you come here?"

Sanji always asked him this. The first few times, the man had looked like he had wanted to give a reply, an honest reply, but he held himself back. He always felt like he was holding himself back.

Instead of answering, the green-haired man would grin at him and flash him a cocky smirk, taunting him to ask more; if he dared.

"Why are you here?"

A question Roronoa Zoro never forgot to ask. Sometimes during the silences or while he gave him a tip, the words never failed to leave his lips.

Sanji, of course, could never tell him the truth and logically liked to spice up his answer.

"To see you of course," he replied today.

Roronoa snorted and handed him a five thousand yen note. Tips were always rare to come by. "Pleasure doing business with you," he said dryly.

"It's all mine," that cocky bastard said with a grin.

When going home in the odd hours of the morning, Sanji reflected on his day and came to the same realization several times. If it weren't for Roronoa Zoro, Sanji might've already lost himself entirely.

A customer that didn't ask much, wasn't pressing for sex, just a bit of conversation and comfortable silence. Someone he didn't need to impress, someone who wasn't trying to impress either. Someone he could be his rotten self with.

Unlocking the door to his rusty old apartment, Sanji fell asleep on the couch despite knowing there would be hell to pay in the morning and drifted off, dreaming of better times with screaming cooks and a loud, full kitchen.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2** : I hope you guys like this new version of chapter 1, please let me know what you think!_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note #1** : So I don't own **One Piece,** I have a long 3 week period of exams coming up in June and then it'll be summer! I've had a pretty good week, aside from studying like hell. I decided to put this up early just so that the anticipation for the next chapter (which will differ greatly from the original chapter 3) will get you guys pumped up. As I said, the first 2 chapters are pretty much the same, but I really think I needed this reboot, I'm not going to screw this up this time around. I'll try not to do this with other stories. The next chapter will be out in June. The thanks for the reviews will be at the end along with a chapter question._

* * *

 ** _Escort Me_**  
 _By: Setkia_ _  
Dedicated to_ _ **CaptainNapkin**_ _cause you're awesome and you totally saved this story from having serious plot issues._

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is an escort in order to pay off debts and buy back the Baratie from Don Krieg. He is charming, flattering and a complete prude. He has a hatred for his job, not at all proud that he's been reduced down to having such a despicable occupation but a certain green-haired regular makes things a bit more bearable.**

 **Roronoa Zoro is a member of a gang, the Shichibukai, and he's regretting it deeply. In order to obtain back a sword of his departed friend, he joined their ranks. He can't handle it some days and goes to rant about it to a curly browed escort. However things change when the gang decides to recruit a member by the name of Sanji.**

* * *

PART ONE: RECRUITMENT

Chapter 2: The Number One Gangster

* * *

"Where is it?"

The middle aged man tried to grab onto the brick wall of the alleyway, but his nails merely scratched and tore under the hard surface. There was no escape and by the fear that entered his eyes, he knew that. Of course, he'd still try to run like all the idiots did. Perhaps he felt shameful that he was being attacked by someone who was more than half his age.

"He'll have it soon," choked out the fat man with his chubby cheeks. "Soon," he repeated in an echoey voice as though to reaffirm himself.

"Define soon."

"Within a week."

 _SLAM!_

The man winced, closing his eyes for the blunt of the blow. His head banged painfully against the wall, certain to have caused damage. The blood trickled down his forehead, getting in his eyes. He looked woozy at the sight of blood. Pathetic,

"Question one!" he spat in the man's face, "what is the rule of the turf?"

"Don't do anything on the turf of someone else without their permission."

"So you _do_ know something," he leered, his lip curling nastily. "Next! Question two: what happens if you go onto someone's turf without their permission?"

"You pay a fine," squeaked the fat man, seeming to lose weight in mere seconds from the pressure he was under. He could smell the fear radiating off of him.

"And what happens if you're late on paying the fine?"

"People come after you." The man licked his lips, trembling. At least he knew when to be scared, he knew his place in the hierarchy system of the streets. "But—"

"There's no exceptions," snapped he. "Hey, can you tell me something else?" the green-haired man purred, leaning even closer. His stomach knotted, he hated the stench of sweat and fear, the way his fingers had to curl around the collar of the man's shirt, practically tearing at the seams. He hated the way he had to use his height to his advantage. "How much force does it take to split the skull in two?"

"I ... I don't know."

"I'm feeling in a scientific mood. Care to be my Guinea pig?"

The man shook his head, his sweat spraying him slightly in the face. "N-no sir!"

"So how about you tell your boss that he's late on his payments and if we don't have them in the next three days, the entire crew will be my test subjects."

The man nodded and his attacker loosened his grip. The man fell down on his backside, scurried to his feet and ran away, practically tripping over his own limbs as he ran to get away.

Doing this always left a bitter taste in his mouth.

 _Only seventy-five million more yen._

* * *

"So?"

Roronoa Zoro threw a cheque at the man in the feathered hat. His cat-eyes analyzed it carefully while the green-haired man took a seat across from him. He tightened his jacket around himself, feeling the ink burn into his skin. It would never come off, he knew that, but still ...

Mihawk frowned. "This is—"

"I told you, he's a stubborn bastard," Zoro cut him off. "You can get the little ones to pay, but you know how Crocodile is. He and his minions are set on being independent."

Zoro vaguely remembered Crocodile, and none of his memories of the man were pleasant not that the last two years of his life had been a joy ride. When he had first started in the gang, he remembered Crocodile sneering at him and yet almost immediately after he had seen Zoro in a fight, he had asked if he was willing to join his rebellion; a group of gang members that Crocodile was planning to lead once he cut his ties with the others. Zoro had rejected him, mainly because he thought Crocodile was insane.

"Damn bastards ..." Mihawk crumpled the cheque in his hand, his eyes piercing straight through Zoro.

"I'm done for the night?" Zoro asked. It was a Wednesday. Though it was never said, never spoken aloud, Zoro had gotten into the habit of calling Wednesday and Sunday routine days.

"You know, I think I should keep you on a tighter leash," said Mihawk, his sharp eyes focusing on the swordsman. "I think I give you too much freedom."

 _Freedom? This is a gang, this is one step away from yakuza, what makes you think this is freedom?_

The outline on his back hurt even more, scorching his flesh.

"You know why I'm here," Zoro told Mihawk, his jaw set in a firm line. "You know my condition."

"You wanted money, correct? And wanted to get it fast. How's that working for you, Roronoa-dono?"

"Just wonderfully," he replied through clenched teeth.

* * *

Getting out of his clothes, he glanced at himself in the mirror. Turning around, he caught sight of his back and felt nauseous. Bold, dark and vibrant colours all intertwined in the image of a Chinese dragon, snaking from just beneath his shoulder blades to the very dip of his back, bordering on his hipbone. The dragon curled and coiled over a dark black stencil for the kanji for strength. Almost immediately, he pulled on a shirt, making sure it hid everything. Sometimes, if he wasn't careful, the slightest of scales were visible and to do that would be taboo. Even more taboo than joining a gang in order to obtain money.

He made sure the material was black and dark, even if he started sweating nothing could be seen and otherwise dressed casually. If he wore his pants too low though, there would also be a problem. He made sure everything was covered, the dragon kept tucked away and impossible to see, before calling a cab.

Why he was here was beyond him. One night of drunk stumbling around had landed him in the red-light distract and he had ended up speaking to some blond with fucked-up eyebrows. He knew that no one else could see it, see that insignia on his back, but he knew it was there as much as he wished it wasn't. He knew others were oblivious to its existence and yet every time someone looked at him, he was sure they could see through his thin clothes, through his disguise, see through his soul. He felt as though everyone was staring at his back, trying to find it, if they didn't know it was there already. Except for when it came to him.

"I'm here for my regular," he told the strange make-up covered man.

Around him, the music was nauseating and pulsating. It made him dizzy and unsteady, pounded at his head almost as much as a hangover. God he hadn't had a good one in a while (and by good, he meant bad). He couldn't understand how people could stand the whole smoke and mirrors business, keeping things secret and under wraps, he was nearly suffocating from his secret alone. At the same time as being able to be as you wished in the club, there was also the privacy of being a secret member. You traded the secrets of your life for a secret life under strobe lights and martinis.

"Regular?" repeated the man. God his voice was so nasally and annoying.

"Blond, thin, smokes a lot, wears black?"

The man nodded, raising an eyebrow, making his ridiculous face look even more ridiculous. "And who are you?"

"Roronoa Zoro."

The man nodded and fiddled with his clipboard and pen for a moment as though he had no idea what to do with it before shoving it behind his ear and rushing off to get him.

The problem with this place that always made Zoro wonder why he came (though he always did come) was the blond. Oh sure it was nice to talk, get some stuff off his chest, to rant about just about anything, regardless if it was relevant or important, and yet where he found his solace in being free, he was trapped.

If he said too much, he was in trouble. If he let too much show, he'd be found out. Barely anyone trusted him, if there was a leak, they'd think it was him. He had to be careful. He had to watch his words and his actions and yet though it was risky and perhaps made him hide more than he'd have liked, he felt so _normal_. As though his biggest problem was coming up with the wittiest remark to that sharp-tongued smoker.

It was liberating.

But never free. No, he traded his freedom in a long time ago.

Bodies were moving against each other and it felt as though he really had entered a different dimension, where people could sway against each other and listen to nauseating music and forget the world. The club was like being on ecstasy, forgetting the world around you and succumbing to everything you were forbidden to.

After a few minutes, the man came back. "Sanji will see you now."

It was a fight to get across the dance floor. There were girls who latched onto him, clung to him and trekked to flirt, but he pushed them off. In the streets he looked like a predator, in the night club he looked like a great fuck, or so he was told.

Walking down the long hallway towards the backroom, the music seemed to fade out, still loud no doubt, but slightly less pronounced, less overwhelming as though he were entering a door within the different dimension, a specialized escape for him alone.

The moment Zoro walked into the room, he felt his breath catch.

Laying outstretched, unbuttoned shirt, lazily spread out was the most popular host in the club. Oh Zoro knew there were female hosts too, he knew it very well, they all tried to jump on him and molest him whenever he walked in, but even as infuriating as this blond was, he had something that let Zoro just go, be and flow and whatever other zen shit you wanted to say; he felt as though the chains were just a bit less intense, maybe just a bit looser, had a bit more oil, they didn't creak every time he walked or moved, almost like they weren't there.

"Curly Brow," he greeted with a smirk.

"Shitty Marimo," Sanji fired back.

Of course he went for his hair. Zoro smirked. "Curlicue."

"Moss-head."

"Dart Brow."

" _Ahou_."

"Ran out of creative comebacks did we?"

"So want to tell me about your shitty day?" It was almost like he wanted to divert the conversation to something Zoro was most uncomfortable about, but to be honest, Zoro was pretty sure it was cause he couldn't think of anything wittier.

"Just dealing with the typical assholes," Zoro said with a shrug. He had learnt early on to hide his hesitance and have something ready at the drop of the hat, some reason or another that would make sense. He found he was telling this blond stranger more truths than lies. Perhaps he knew the most about him, which was a pretty sad thing; when the host at some dodgy club knows your whole life story. "Nothing unusual. They really need to learn about punctuality or else I wouldn't have to be so hard on them ..."

Zoro wasn't sure why but silence with the host was never awkward or suffocating. The occasional comments to drag him out of his thoughts, but otherwise nothing of much substance. The way he looked at him, it reminded Zoro of _her_.

If she knew what would she think? He could imagine her running her fingers down his back, tracing the outline of the ink, muttering about how it was unfair, that Zoro was allowed into the club because he was a man, because he had muscles and no rack. Then again, he might not be in this position had she not ...

"Why do you come here?"

Zoro was shaken out of his thoughts by the host's low baritone. It was always this part of the night Zoro hated most. Not because he was parting with the bastard, but because of the look he gave him. The look he gave him was so much like _hers_ , it shook him to the core. Questioning, slightly envious (why this man was envious of his situation, Zoro didn't know, though he supposed the man didn't know his business), as though trying to solve a puzzle and the last pieces just wouldn't fit, mystified and just a tad enraptured.

Instead of answering his question, Zoro gave him a cocky smirk.

"Why are you here?"

Assumptions were things Zoro learnt to never make. He knew that people would make assumptions about him, about his earrings, about the marking on his back, about the scar across his chest, about his green-hair, about the way he always seemed to be glaring, about the way he chose to wear dark colours, the way he was always quiet and was always drinking. About his choice in career. He knew he hadn't ended up this way because he wanted to be. He had ended up this way because of circumstance. Because of need. And he was never going to make assumptions about someone else and so he always gave the man a chance to explain himself.

"To see you of course."

Zoro snorted and handed him a twenty. And as always, the bastard gave up the chance to clear things up. He was pretty damn close to saying the man did it because he liked sex.

"Pleasure doing business with you," Sanji said in that voice of his that sounded so sensual and yet at the same time, was filled with mirth.

"It's all mine," Zoro shot back.

He didn't want to mention that the only reason he was probably still sane was because of these meetings. He felt as though Sanji had an already big enough ego, being the most requested host of the place did numbers to your self-esteem, so he wouldn't mention it.

Of all the members of the Shichibukai, Zoro was the only one with no murders under his belt.

This was a fact he constantly reminded himself of. Causality count: zero.

It was the one last shred of his humanity left.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** The thank-yous! I'm also going to try and thank every new follower and favoriter, (I know that's not a word), just cause I think you deserve recognition). And I also have great news. A couple of months ago I had to write a short story for a provincial competition against 23 different schools in a special school board that spreads across the province (including my own) (I'm Canadian) and my school came in 1st, and it was my story! So really, I want to appreciate everyone who appreciates my writing because you guys have no idea how much it means to me, even though it sounds really cheesy, a writer really is nothing without readers. You guys help encourage me to continue writing even though I have parents who yes, encourage me to do what I want, but rather I have a stable job than write for a living. You're wonderful for my self-esteem in writing, and I'm really happy so many of you like my writing!_

 _lilcutieprincess : Thank God, that was kinda the purpose of the reboot, I wasn't happy with chapter length and such, but I do think I can do this right._

 _a reviewer: The way the boys met changed, if you didn't notice, in this story rather than coming directly into the bar, Zoro stumbles around the front and meets Sanji by accident, rather than Sanji being on his shift. I do intend on writing maybe a one-shot about the meeting._

 _crystalbluefox : By extension, I must mention you for being so good as to bother with this renewal of the story. I know it must be annoying to read the same story over again, but I promise, I'll make it good!_

 _Thank you for:_  
 _ **Favoriting:** minichampi, Son Kumkio, SoulKagome, eyes0nme19, DarkerThanBlack1209, Freedeal, Aj the human, Eternal-Flame-Babe, goldyylocks, DarkerThanBlack1209_  
 _ **Following** : minichampi, SagaE, lilcutieprincess, clementyneoh9,roaer, LilMizFuNsiZe, Son Kumkio, Gumbyfair, SoulKagome, AirieDLokie, Flika, goldyylocks, Freedeal, KuraiFlame16, bakayaro onna, Aj the human, Cottonpaw, draugs, arisa4_

 _So now my question for this chapter: Those of you have read **Beautiful Disaster** know I am a sucker for references, I always like it when something I like references something else I like, so I did it in here. Zoro's confrontation with the man who was too late to pay the fee of entering enemy territory is a parody/mimic of a certain beginning chapter of a certain other **Shonen Jump** series that is part of the big 3. Better yet, if you can name the top 3 **Shonen Jump** mangas (there are 3 in particular I'm thinking of, who seem to almost always stay in the top seat of scantalations at least) I'll give you bonus points and an extra shout-out. So what manga is Zoro's confrontation mimicking? _


	3. Chapter 3

_**Author's Note #1:** So I don't do too much now a days, besides studying. I'm not going to update until my exams are over. I am now going to be a very busy since, no need to brag (kinda feel like bragging cause it feels pretty good, especially after being shut down by my school to go to Japan ... I'm still slightly depressed over that, been filling myself up with Japanese things to clear up the hole in my heart, though of course I had to stop to study, but anyway the news! I'm officially a yearbook editor! Which means I need to learn about teamwork. I'm not that great at teamwork but anyway, my worries aside, I don't own **One Piece.** I am now, in terms of story, in the Impel Down arc, but like, the beginning of it. Luffy's inside the prison, I wish I could see other straw hats, I like Luffy just fine, however I'm that person who, no matter how important the fight scene in front of me is important, I'm the one going WHERE THE F IS (INSERT MISSING STRAW-HAT HERE) if I haven't seen them in about 15 episodes. So mainly, yeah, I'm the one screaming WHERE THE F IS SANJI?! Which sucks since I really like Sanji and he's the one most likely to go running off and not tell anyone his plan. Like Little Garden and Water 7 going to the f-ing train station. I don't actually swear in real life, just a little fact for you all._

* * *

 ** _Escort Me_**  
 _By: Setkia_ _  
Dedicated to_ _ **CaptainNapkin**_ _cause you're awesome and you totally saved this story from having serious plot issues._

* * *

 **Full Summary**

 **Sanji is an escort in order to pay off debts and buy back the Baratie from Don Krieg. He is charming, flattering and a complete prude. He has a hatred for his job, not at all proud that he's been reduced down to having such a despicable occupation but a certain green-haired regular makes things a bit more bearable.**

 **Roronoa Zoro is a member of a gang, the Shichibukai, and he's regretting it deeply. In order to obtain back a sword of his departed friend, he joined their ranks. He can't handle it some days and goes to rant about it to a curly browed escort. However things change when the gang decides to recruit a member by the name of Sanji.**

* * *

PART ONE: RECRUITMENT

Chapter 3: The Black Bandana

* * *

Women were very pretty. Sanji admired their beauty and their grace, their frail bodies and smooth skin, their long lashes, their supple bodies and their class. What he did not admire however, was how yet another customer was running her fingers up his thigh yet again and it felt as though she were leaving holes in his skin.

Her expensive ring flashed and Sanji frowned. Was everyone like this? Perhaps he sounded like a romantic, but did everyone have to be so very unfaithful? What would it take for him to meet someone who wasn't in it for sex, who wanted a relationship and who could be counted on to not go off looking for sex elsewhere? Was he just being idealistic? He supposed his best chance to find someone was to get out of this club in the first place, but he needed the money. He made enough, he was reaching his goal, but at the same time, he knew how he could get more money faster. He just wasn't willing to subject himself to such affairs.

Sanji gently took the woman's hand off of his thigh and held it in his. "Miss, I must object, your approach is flattering I can admit, however I—"

 _SMACK!_

Sanji blinked. He gently raised a hand to his cheek, a red bruise beginning to form. The girl looked close to tears, her eyes hidden behind sunglasses, though the hurt was heavily implied. "Am I disgusting? Is that why?" she asked. Her frizzy dark brown hair fell, her figure was a bit pudgy, her legs kinda looked like stubs and her skin looked rather rough smooth and yet Sanji wouldn't touch her, not below the waist and definitely not above her stomach.

"Miss—"

"Don't you 'Miss' me," she said. "What do I need to do? Am I too fat? Am I ugly? What do you want from me? Am I not enough? You're so cruel Sanji-kun! You lead a girl on, convince her you like her and then when she presses you for more you just ..." She threw up her hands and shook her head. "I can't! I can't stand it anymore! You're such a prude! Such a ... Such a ..." Realization seemed to dawn in her eyes. "You're gay, aren't you?"

"I'm not," said Sanji. "I may not desire the same things you do at this moment, but I can assure you I am not gay."

"Then what is it? What am I missing?"

"Nothing, absolutely nothing, you're gorgeous," said Sanji and he meant it. "It's not you, it's me. It's ... It's complicated..."

The girl huffed, picking up her purse and strode out of the room with purpose in her stride, muttering about how she didn't need men.

* * *

"Again?"

Sanji rolled his eyes and ignored Bentham's comment.

"I don't know why you don't just give in already, it's not as though you don't want to," the man reasoned.

Sanji glared at him, clearly stating that he did not want to talk about it without having to say a word.

"I'm just curious!"

Oh no, Sanji was _not_ having this conversation again. He refused to, he had been asked way too many times. In the past two years he had been working at the club, they always wanted to know why he was such a "prude" as they put it.

"You know, sleeping with the clients is practically part of the contract," said Bentham. He frowned. "There are some gorgeous men around here,—"

" _Married_ men," Sanji reminded him.

"So what?" He shrugged. "I suppose the women are also pretty, if you're into that thing ..."

"Why is my sex life so important for you?" demanded Sanji.

"You mean your _lack_ of a sex life?"

Sanji rolled his eyes and pulled out a cigarette. He lit it up and let the smoke relax his senses.

"All I'm saying is that if you're one of those romantic saps, this is not the place for you, if it wasn't obvious to you in the first place. I mean sure, if you want all that romance and sweet talk and perfect princesses, damsels in distress, I have no problem with that. But still ... Coming to a host club to find it? I don't know why you're here, and I won't ask because I know it's none of my business, but love in a host club? That never works out, not for long anyway. You saving yourself or something?"

"It's none of your fucking business how I spend my time with my clients."

"Are you gay?"

Sanji glared at him. "Don't confuse me with you."

"I'm not, I just mean you haven't done it with any of the girls and you never do anything with them, now that I think about it. Did you think working here was like at a bar or something? Entertain them while mixing drinks and being witty? Plus you only have one male client, which might make me believe you like him. He's quite a hottie."

Sanji felt like gagging. Sure, Zoro was attractive, but not to him. In general he could appreciate the appearance of another man, he knew he was attractive in the way you knew a baby was cute, it was a fact, a combustion of different traits that made him pleasing to the eyes. Tall, tanned (though he knew most people in Japan weren't that into tanned skin), muscular and he had a brooding, mysterious aura to him, of course he was attractive. He seemed dangerous. It was a certain type of charm that Sanji didn't quite possess, though people thought he was edgy because of his fondness for cigarettes. Zoro was like the vague outline of everything women in host clubs wanted; tall, mysterious, dark, potentially dangerous, holding some dark tragic past which needs healing courtesy of the loving touch of a woman. He was eye-candy.

"He drinks too much, isn't one for conversation and has the mouth of a sailor," Sanji said as though by mentioning these things it would make Zoro less appealing but from the look in Bentham's eyes, he was now more intrigued. "Look, I can admit he's an enigma and that in and of itself is appealing to others, but I don't swing that way. I can see why girls like him, I guess why you like him ..."

"He has a really dominating aura, doesn't he? Like he'll just throw you on a bed, tie you up and—"

"Finish that sentence and I'll soufflé you."

"You can't be appreciative of a little imagination?"

Sanji scoffed. "He wouldn't go for you anyway, he's straight as a board."

Bentham grinned. "You think I can't make him change his tune?"

Sanji inhaled deeply, letting the smoke clear his head. "Just get me my next client."

Sure he knew that a host club wasn't the place if he wanted to find a meaningful relationship, but he had to do what he had to do. And if he was eaten alive in the process, Sanji didn't care. He owed Zeff at least that much.

"Well, you've got him next actually," said Bentham. "He looks awkward as hell around all the women, think you gonna go and save him from the hoard of drooling fangirls? Be his knight in shining armour?"

Sanji rolled his eyes. "You know I'm not like you."

"Sure you're not."

Sanji pushed past Bentham and entered the main area of the club with the pounding music and overwhelming smell of booze and liquor. It stuck to his clothes and he always had to take such longer showers to get rid of the nauseating smell.

He spotted Zoro in an instant, standing, as Bentham had put it, awkwardly amongst the girls who were all swarming him. He was holding onto his arm, trying to elbow his way out of the crowd.

Sanji slipped through the mob of people easily until he was face to face with the Marimo. "Well good evening."

A girl grabbed at Sanji's arm and he turned to her. She had bright, big eyes, but that smile of hers was less than innocent. "Sanji-kun! Are you free?"

"Actually, I'm not," Sanji said, layering on the sweetness in his voice. "Sadly, this guy over here has me scheduled for the next two hours." He smacked Zoro in the arm playfully, tightening his grip on him. Zoro flinched. It was barely noticeable. Sanji ignored it.

"Aw," the girl whined. "You'll see me next though, right?"

"Whatever you wish," Sanji said, flashing her a smile. "Come on, Roronoa."

He dragged Zoro by his arm through the throng of people into the back hallway, and finally into Sanji's own private room. He closed the door behind him and puffed out his smoke. "Seems like you're popular."

Zoro scoffed.

"Some of their offers seemed tempting, you didn't want to take them up on it?"

Zoro rolled his eyes. "A bunch of sleazy, good-for-nothing sluts? I'm clean, I'd like to stay clean."

Sanji nodded. He didn't like to think too much about how, despite the fact that Sanji was an escort, someone who was paid to spend time with those around him, someone who was paid to, technically, as Bentham put it, have sex with anyone who asked, Zoro seemed to put him in a different category from them. He felt as though that helped him retain some of his dignity.

* * *

For a big guy who didn't say much, Sanji found that Zoro was great company. After he left he always felt like the room was just a bit too empty. He leaned back against the couch and could still smell the man in the cushions. Steel, mint and something he couldn't define.

Sanji froze.

There was something different. Something he knew wasn't the same. Though he couldn't define the final component of the tanned man's scent he knew it wasn't the metallic scent that seemed to surround him and the couch.

He felt around the cushions before his hand managed to get a hold of something. He pulled it away and held it up, recognizing it as a black bandana. And that's where the strange metallic scent was coming from.

Sanji realized upon closer inspection he knew this scent.

It was blood.

* * *

 _ **Author's Note #2:** Okay the thank-yous!_

 _SoulKagome: Yeah well, I realize that maybe not everyone reviews but that doesn't mean they aren't reading, I mean I love reviews but I also love getting e-mails about how someone added the story to their favorites._

 _blueexorcistfansince2012 : Um, I actually didn't change anything about the dragon tattoo. I think I have an obsession with piercings and tattoos though, but come on, as if Zoro doesn't look like he'd have a tattoo._

 _LilMizFuNsiZe : Thank you so much, it really means something to me that you like my writing! I sound cheesy as hell and realize where all that "honour" comes from in anime, because honestly, a writer is nothing without their readers. My friend's kinda sick of anime, she's just like, "if I hear one more word about honour, I'll commit seppuku, which in case you didn't know, is a way to commit suicide in Japan, and I just realize that it's what Zoro did with Mihawk, except he lived. It's also known as "honor suicide", seppuku is more specific towards Japan, it's basically where you kill yourself to escape the shame of something, in Zoro's case, it was his defeat to Mihawk._

 _lilcutieprincess : I swear my friend will kill me, I stopped watching Bleach after 50 episodes before the end. She's going to kill me for it one day._

 _Okay so the top 3 of **Shonen Jump** (what I think is the top 3), are **Naruto, One Piece and Bleach** , not necessarily in that order. And, as a bonus 4th, yes **Fairy Tail.** Now here's the thing, Zoro was mimicking the first chapter of **Bleach** called **"Death and the Strawberry** ", which I soon realized was not because Ichigo had a strawberry head, (Which he does) but is a pun on the meaning of the word "Ichigo". Anyway he starts to quiz/lecture a bunch of people who kicked over this little girl's memorial thing, it's awesome, he bashes their brains in. Anyway, so yeah ..._

 _New followers: S hadow Lily Potter, murruemioria, blueangel205, BubbleToMyTea, Lost Green Tiger, bonusbillet, Razalas (just realized that was Salazar spelt backwards, well done!), Move-2-da-beat-femme_  
 _New favorites: Silver-Dragon-02, murruemioria, Lost Green Tiger, Lithium012, Move-2-da-beat-femme,_

 _Now for the question: Do you know who Sanji's client was who slapped him? I don't make OCs, and also, if you you've read the original, or not, still, why's there blood on Zoro's bandana?_


End file.
